matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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