God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
The beer is more important than you right now.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
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