Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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