an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I had to cum in my sink.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
