i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
