yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Sober January is a disaster.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Randomize
