I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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