talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
