i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
