if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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