"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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