just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I've blown a few things in my day
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
