He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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