The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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