Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
