office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
