So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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