garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
