I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
