like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
home. puking in laundry basket.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
