Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
In other news, I just burned my penis
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
