I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
