There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
bring money and cleavage
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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