did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
