Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
