come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize