party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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