The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
