I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
