It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
