She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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