shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize