i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Pants are for mortals
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
