Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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