atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
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