We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
We had to coat check the pizza.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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