3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
no. you can't hotbox the world.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize