tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
