he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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