We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
