How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Randomize
