can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Im just a social blackout drinker.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize