i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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