Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
