i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
