haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
