There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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