I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
