We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
