I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
