i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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