I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
