I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
