I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
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